ready... set... launch!

Ok, so for MONTHS I've been saying I would create a blog, but I'm getting kind of old, and teaching an old dog new tricks isn't always the easiest thing so this took lots of learning for me to figure out even the basics :)  But here goes... I'm going to try to do my best to keep our friends near and far posted on life... the good, bad and the ugly.  I was stuck for weeks (probably more accurate to say months!) on a name too.  Everything I thought of had the domain name taken, or just didn't sound quite right.  But I kept coming back to this one... Life Without Blinders.  It's a motto I've grown to try to accept over the past few years.  You see, I lived a good majority of my life wearing masks... pretending to be someone I wasn't.  Wanting to be someone different than who I really was.  Wanting people to think I had it all together, when really, behind the blinders, life wasn't so pretty.  And I slowly (yes, it took a LONG time!) realized that I wasn't the only one living with blinders to reality, and trying to convince not only others, but myself too, that life was pretty and put together and all fit nicely in a box with a bow.  It's an exhausting thing to try to keep up that facade though.  Really, it's more like living a lie... calling it living with masks or blinders just makes it sound prettier.  So one ugly night, I decided to let the blinders fall and be me.  The real me.  And I don't regret it for a minute.  I actually would call it freeing, both for myself, as well as for others, as I find it much easier for someone else to be raw and real with me when they know I don't have it all together and will be raw and real right back.  I haven't looked back, but instead I've decided to try to live each day without blinders.  The "what you see is what you get" type of living.  It's actually much easier that way too, because you don't have to pretend.  I just get to be me.  Take it or leave it, me.  And so if I'm walking through a beautiful garden and smelling all the roses, you get to walk that journey with me.  And if I'm in a storm, you'll know that too, and you may or may not choose to walk that journey too.
So right now... if you're just picking up my story... you may want to scroll back and start at the beginning of this blog posts and just catch yourself up a bit on my story... well, really, it's Kai's story.  It's a long one, so be warned.  But it's my story.  Without Blinders.  You'll read our moments full of hope, and others full of discouragement and frustrations.  Moments of joy and moments of pain.  But hopefully, in all of it, you'll see God's fingerprints.  After all, this is HIS story.  HE chose me to walk this journey... the good, bad and ugly. Is it a journey I would have picked for myself?  No, right now I can't say that it is.  One day, maybe, I'll share the entire journey with you.  But for today, my focus is my son.  My incredible fighter... my ninja as he likes to be called... Brayden "Kai".
So for those of you who have been following, encouraging, praying, supporting, caring, and loving on us from near and far... thank you!  And for those just now catching up... hang on tight because this ride is full of mountains and valleys, storms and rainbows, laughter and tears... all in one!  Welcome to my journey...